Thursday, May 01, 2008

Moaning & groaning

I have the lovely pleasure of meeting with the court social worker & my ex once again today. A new report has been at the top of the news in Israel during the past few days - including the recommendation that mothers not be automatically awarded custody of children under 6 (which has been the standard so far). I am sure that in many cases, this is the right thing, but I can't imagine how much more I would have had to give up if my ex had tried to get custody of my kids and actually had a chance. As it was, I gave up a lot (financially) just to get out. I think that there needs to be some sort of labeling for abusive partners so that their ex-spouses don't have to continue to go through hell with them just because everyone naturally assumes they're decent human beings. I mean, the fact that the social worker thinks it's fine for me to have to have my ex agree to the kids going to the scouts - in writing - before he has to pay for it is insane. He doesn't want to pay for anything, therefore he just won't agree. How smart do you have to be to understand that???

It also made me really mad that my ex showed Lilach a piece of blank paper with the bank's logo on it as 'proof' that he has no money. I think it's really slimy to try to take advantage of the fact that he thinks she's not very smart. (She's much smarter than he thinks. She came home right away to ask me if that really means anything or not. I assured her that it does not.)

Here are some pictures from yesterday:

Yirmi has a question

Yirmi loves being on this blanket and he bats at things - not deliberately, but it's a start...

Nomi the junk collector
Nomi, holding the license plate Hadas found and plans to put in her new dorm. Check out her orange shoes...

Ohad & Yirmi

Ohad and Yirmi in the garden. I love to see them together :-)


AwkwardMoments said...

well that was quite an ordeal - but the kids look so cute!

Aurelia said...

Trouble is--proving it to a court, unfortunately difficult in every country. I'm so sorry.

The money thing is an interesting issue. Here they have tried to set precise amounts based on income that automatically determine support levels so that it limits the amount of fighting. That is supposed to cover any expense except for something exceptionally expensive amounts.

Doesn't help with the permission part but it helps with the financial part and because moms can't "give up" benefits that go to their kids, it limits the negotiating/blackmail issues.

Again, I'm sorry, what a pain in the rear.

Bea said...

Love the pics. The rest... what a quagmire. I'm hoping you can get through this latest round with sanity intact.


Anonymous said...

Your kids are so cute!!! and what a sweety - the little baby

Anonymous said...

oops, that last anon. comment was from me.

JCK said...

Sorry you are having a bad time with the EX.

Loved the pictures!

And I am THRILLED that you might be coming to BLOGHER. Oh, I hope you do!!! I would love to meet you, too.

Unknown said...

Thank you for commenting on my blog. You have a beautiful family. I'm sorry you are dealing with a jerk of an ex, expecially one that resorts to such low methods.

Sarah said...

great pictures! we have the same play mat and it's still going strong at 6 months. she just loves it. now she sits up and plays with it.

UGH about your ex. i'm so sorry.

Malky B. said...

What a head of hear on the baby! Beautiful pics!