Thursday, August 12, 2010

So let me rephrase this...

Still on the topic of adoption... If you ever considered adoption, what were your concerns? Would you have / did you go ahead with it? If not, why not? If you did, what things surprised you most?

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Dee update: All's well. Now at about 11 weeks :-) They've even picked out a name (if it's a boy).

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Also coming soon: Medical research reveals that lycopene improves male fertility in men who have a concentration of >5 million cells/ml. I first heard about this in 2000 or 2001 and have been recommending it to people as "something worth trying". It's nice to see that the research has shown its effects to be statistically significant.

2 comments:

Bea said...

Lycopene? Hm. We have been eating a lot of tomatoes this year... although 5 million/ml sounds like kind of a lot...

On the subject of adoption: yes, we considered it. Our concerns were that applications were closed indefinitely, and that average waiting times from date of application were hovering at the 7+ year mark. That was for international adoption, domestic adoption being pretty much non-existent. Pretty cut and dried there, I guess.

We eventually moved internationally to somewhere where adoption was possible within a more forseeable time frame. Yes, ability to adopt was one reason for the move. (Ironically, just after we moved, applications re-opened back home, with a promise that the wait would only be 5yrs on average now, although I am still skeptical about the latter part - we will see in another year or two if they have managed to deliver on that promise.) (Note that moving internationally cut our waiting time down to 1.5-2yrs, with 12 months of that just being establishment of residential status, the other 6-12 months being the actual adoption process, although the range of countries was different and our first choice was closed off because of the move.)

We continued IVF during the one-year wait and it worked towards the end of that year, as you know. To be clear, we hadn't made any final decisions, but literally we had agreed to start contacting agencies upon my return from our successful cycle, but the night I got home I got the positive peestick and it never happened.

I still had a lot of unanswered questions about the ethics of adoption, plus health concerns regarding my risk of breast cancer, plus I think you have to be pretty resilient to go through that sort of process, and my resilience was at a low ebb. And I'm not sure the Mr was 100% on board yet. So still a lot of concerns, really, and I can't say for sure whether or not we would have gone ahead after making a more thorough investigation - although I think it's likely we would have eventually.

Bea

Bea said...

And great for Dee!

Bea